Good Fences Make Good Neighbors in Business and Life
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Title: Good Fences Make Good Neighbors in Business and Life
Word Count: 462
Author: Anne Alexander
Email: anne@authentic-alternatives.com
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Good Fences Make Good Neighbors in Business and Life
Copyright 2005 Anne Alexander
If you say "yes" to most things that come your way, you may
be a nice person, but you're probably not a very happy one.
Establishing good boundaries is a big challenge for many
people. And it is an essential time management skill for
creating a successful professional life.
Here are a couple of key tools for establishing healthy and
effective boundaries:
- Set specific periods of every day when you take calls
and answer email. Don't become a slave to email, the phone
or IM.
- Learn how to say "no¨ in a socially acceptable way. Use
a neutral tone of voice, not overly excited or defensive
and not in a depressed, eeyore-like way.
For example, if you're asked to serve on another board or
committee, you might say something like this: "I love what
your organization does, but I've made a commitment to spend
more time with my kids, so I can't take on anything more
right now. But thanks for asking.¨
- Get your boss to set up regular meeting times with you to
discuss important issues. Waiting around for answers you
need about a project is a time termite - an activity that
eats up your time and your life.
Here's a golden time management tip nugget: We teach
people how to treat us. If you are constantly interrupted
by email or instant messaging, for example, if you always
respond immediately, you are training the senders that you
will always be available, instantly. In some situations
that can be handy, but most of the time, it is just a huge
time termite that you must learn to control or it will eat
you alive.
This is the same with the infamous "open door" policy.
While it is excellent management to be available to your
staff and/or co-workers on a regular basis, it is insane to
be available 8 hours a day (or 10 hours, or, God forbid,
"24/7" one of the worst concepts ever created). Teach and
train your staff (and your boss, if you have one!) when you
are unavailable for visits or interruptions (barring true
emergencies) for critical project time.
Question: If you jump every time someone calls, emails,
IMs, pops their head in your door or otherwise initiates
contact with you, what does that make you? Answer: a
jumping bean. Not a human being. So which are you?
Consider this article to be an official coach permission
slip to erect strong, healthy boundaries - a good, solid
fence. As Robert Frost said, Good fences make good
neighbors. If it makes it easier to blame your change of
behavior on someone else, just tell them your coach (that
would be me) told you that you had to do it! Remember, good
boundaries will help you take back your life.
About the Author:
Ready to be a power professional? Get business coach Anne
Alexander's free 8 part e-course "Maximize Your
Professional Success," at
www.authentic-alternatives.com/maximizenow.htm
.Warning! For real people only. No fakers, please.
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