Hashemian Blog
Huh? What?
Wednesday, March 31, 2004
of beasts and breasts
i admit it, i'm not a sports nut. while men were stuffing themselves with junk food and beer and high-fiving each other after each fumble or touchdown during the super bowl, i was probably watching steve irwin wrestling alligators on animal planet. so it goes without saying that i missed the fateful breast exposure scene that’s been the talk of the nation. i guess i could google janet jackson and score that clip in dozens of sites, but why?
what exactly is to be gained by watching a man tearing a plate off a woman’s chest and exposing a mammary gland? you want real filth, head to your nearest adult store and grab a ron jeremy flick off the shelf. you’ll feel much more satisfied, and no controversy to grapple with. but no, what fun would that be? it's just a bunch of naked people and no controversy to keep it interesting.
the point is that america suffers from a real identity crisis when it comes to the subject of sex. everyone condemns it, and yet everyone does it and not just with their spouses. the likes of howard stern, no matter what you think of him, are portrayed as perverted beasts, out there to corrupt the masses, while misleading the nation to launch an unjust war is viewed as morally upright. go figure.
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// posted by rh
Tuesday, March 30, 2004
ask what you can do for atkins
i've been overweight all of my adult life. actually going by the medical charts, i'm borderlining on obese. the extra 30 pounds i carry have been with me through thick and thin, so to speak. i fanatically jog every other day, some hiking and swimming in between, but the weight is stuck on me like glue.
i'd like to shake the extra weight off, but the best i could ever manage has been about 5 measly pounds, and the only reason i know that is because every time i go to see my doctor, i have to get on the scale in the office. it's like a border guard strategically positioned right before i enter the examination room. the results are always the same. here's the prescription for your ailment, and by the way, you should lose some weight.
so do i go home and redouble my efforts to exercise more, eat less, and weigh myself everyday? yeah right. life's too short to obsess about such trifles. i eat lots of fruits and vegetables, not because they are good for my health, but because i enjoy them in between my high fat and high carb diet. so i get 5 fewer years to live. what's an extra 5 years or even 15 years relative to the age of the universe? not even close to the proverbial blink of an eye. why suffer a lifetime of deprivation for a few extra years? let me die fat and happy.
so what can atkins do for me? nothing. what can i do for atkins? also nothing. sounds like a fair deal to me.
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// posted by rh
Friday, March 26, 2004
under god, over god, whatever...
sometimes the issues discussed in this country are so asinine. here's an atheist guy who has a bone to pick with his ex-wife and thus has made an issue with the "under god" portion of the pledge that his daughter feels pressure to recite in school everyday. who cares?
tell your daughter not to recite that portion or skip the whole pledge. i don't care if your are a disbeliever or a die-hard orthodox, the word god, as used in the legal system, money, and the pledge could be interpreted in any number of ways by people but who has the time to stop and contemplate a sinister notion behind it? why am i even wasting time writing about this?
you want to worship god, go for it. you want to disbelieve, that's your right too. and if you object to the word god printed on money, don't hesitate to unload it on me.
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// posted by rh

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